Beating the Holiday Blues ─ Tips for a Happier Season

The winter holiday season is in full swing and everywhere you look there are lights, decorations and expressions of happiness and joy.

So, why aren’t you feeling it?

The “holiday blues” are actually a lot more common than most people realize. While anybody can end up feeling stressed and overwhelmed by all the pressures of the season, those who are prone to depression, anxiety or other mental health disorders can be particularly susceptible to seasonal melancholy – the kind that can’t be wiped away by a Hallmark movie binge and a little eggnog or spiked hot chocolate.

If you’re feeling down this holiday season, take comfort in the fact that you’re definitely not an outlier. Roughly three out of every five people in this country say that the holiday season has a negative effect on their mental health for one reason or another. That makes it particularly important to have some self-care strategies in place.

First, Understand What’s Behind Your Holiday Blue Mood

There are a host of different factors that can contribute to the holiday blues, and you may be the emotional victim of more than one of the following:

• Unrealistic expectations: Everywhere you turn, the media portrays the holiday season as a perfect mishmash of love, happiness and togetherness – but many people’s realities don’t align with these Hollywood ideals. 
• Financial stress: No matter how you look at it, the holidays are expensive – and few people have unlimited budgets. The cost of all that holiday cheer can really add up, and that can lead to a lot of mental strain (and guilt) over money.
• Family dynamics: There’s nothing like the holiday season to stir up complex family dynamics and shatter already fragile and strained interpersonal relationships. The pressure to interact with difficult relations can easily leave you feeling tense and anxious.
• Grief and loss: The loss of a loved one can feel especially profound during the holiday season since things simply aren’t the same without their presence. Similarly, if you have recently gone through a romantic rift or marital breakup, you may have a difficult time enduring the spirit of “togetherness” that the season embodies.

And for some people, the holiday season is just too chaotic. It seems to begin earlier each year, and if you don’t do well when your daily routine is blown to pieces, all the irregular eating, sleeping and social gatherings can wreak havoc on your physical and mental balance. If you’re not a social butterfly, the whole holiday season can just be too much to handle.

Second, Try These Practical Tips to Manage the Seasonal Stressors

Taking care of yourself during the holiday season is essential for maintaining mental and emotional balance. Here are some strategies to help you navigate the season more mindfully and peacefully:

1. Set Realistic Expectations

Instead of striving for the “perfect” holiday, set realistic expectations. Avoid comparing your holiday experience with others – especially media portrayals. It’s really OK if everything doesn’t go exactly as planned, and those mishaps often become the funniest future stories and best holiday memories. Focus on whatever is important to you, whether that’s spending quality time with a few special people, giving back to the community or simply taking a break and curling up with a pile of good books.

2. Create a Holiday Budget

Put your credit cards away and start repeating the mantra in your head until you really believe it, “It’s the thought that counts.” Budget how much you can afford for travel, food, events and gifts and stick with it. If you can’t afford much, a card with a handwritten note will do. Consider making handmade gifts or suggesting drawing names for a family Secret Santa to reduce costs.

3. Don’t Abandon All Your Healthiest Habits

The holiday season often comes with indulgent foods and disrupted schedules, but taking care of your physical health can have a huge impact on your mental well-being. Try to maintain a balanced diet, stay hydrated, get enough sleep and try to get a little exercise – even if it’s just a quick walk around the block to clear your head after the family dinner.

4. Make Time for Self-Reflection

The holidays are busy – to be sure – but setting aside time to relax can be incredibly important. Schedule some “me time” on your calendar so that you can think about the year that has passed, decide on some goals and quietly acknowledge your achievements, however small. Setting goals for the upcoming year can help you find meaning and purpose in the season. That gives you something to look forward to once all the festivities are over.

5. Limit Your Social Media Consumption

Social media can be a fantastic way to keep in touch with far-flung friends and relatives, but it can also heighten your feelings of inadequacy if you compare your life to the carefully curated posts of others during the holidays. If you find that you feel sad or grumpy after being on social media, it’s time to limit your exposure for a while. Remind yourself that what people post often doesn’t reflect the full reality of their lives.

6. Set Boundaries with Social Commitments

Attending every holiday event may not be feasible – especially if it drains you emotionally. Give yourself permission to say “no” when necessary. Politely declining an invitation doesn’t mean you don’t care about others. It merely indicates that you choose to prioritize your mental well-being. Consider practicing responses like, “Thank you for the invitation, but I’ll have to pass this time. I hope you have a wonderful celebration!” That way, it will roll off your tongue and you won’t be at a loss for words.

7. Find New Ways to Celebrate

If you’re struggling with grief this holiday season from any kind of loss, sticking to the old traditions can merely highlight your sense of loss. Look for new ways to celebrate, even if that means stepping outside of your comfort zone or going away for a couple of days.

You’re Not a Grinch if You’re Not Feeling Especially Merry

Whatever the reasons you’re struggling with the holiday mayhem, it’s okay if you find yourself a little un-merry. Be gentle with yourself. Take the time to prioritize your own needs and be at peace knowing that the best gift you can give yourself is a little bit of extra grace.